How to Elevate Your Personal Style and Break Free from a Basic Look

How to Elevate Your Personal Style and Break Free from a Basic Look

This video explores why many men fall into a basic style rut and offers practical advice to upgrade their look. It emphasizes the importance of having clear goals, tracking progress, understanding body proportions, and building a versatile wardrobe with essential pieces. The speaker encourages incremental improvements and consistency, drawing parallels to habit formation and personal growth. Key tips include choosing clothes that fit well, using accessories, and stepping out of comfort zones to develop a signature style.

Why You Look Basic (And How To Fix It ASAP). | Transcript:

Now, notice I said simple, not easy. Don't confuse those two words. I think Carl von Kloschwitz said it best, everything in war is simple, but the simplest thing is incredibly difficult. What this means in reference to the first point about having a dream is that it seems so easy, so simple. It's something that we had as kids when we didn't have all the inhibitions, we didn't have all the responsibilities. We dreamt of going to space, we dreamt of exploring the oceans, we dreamt of making a difference. with something that nowadays we're like, oh,

that's not practical. I can't make money doing that. There's just no way that I'm ever going to be able to accomplish this with all of these responsibilities and everything I've got in tow. But, here's the thing, gents, when you lose your dreams, when you don't have goals, when you don't have lofty ambitions, all of a sudden you just don't have the drive that you used to have and this is going to stop you from getting and achieving what you want in life. because to achieve what you want, you got to go after it. I mean was Yogi Berra that

said if you don't know where you're going, you're going to wind up somewhere else. And for so many of us, that is what has happened. You've got to take the time to take a step back and say, know what? What are my adult dreams? What do I really want to go after with the time I have left on this planet? change your default style settings. Now, for those of you guys in the IT world, you know that a default is a pre-designed value when a value or setting is not specified by the program user. Default settings for human beings are a very powerful

influence on the decision we make. So, my question, if you want to up your daily style, what is your style default right now? Well, first up, a lot of guys can't even answer this question because they haven't thought about if you have thought about it and even if you adjusted it a decade ago, here's the thing, you haven't really changed anything for 10 years. Seriously, you're in your mid-30s wearing the same clothing you bought in your mid-20s. Now, for most guys, their default style settings are going to be the clothing that's easy for you to grab right

out of your closet. T-shirts, jeans, running shoes, a baseball cap. And who knows, that outfit choice, it may be your style. You really have thought about this. But, I have a feeling a lot of you guys have dreams, you have ambitions, you have work that honestly there's a bit of disconnect. between the way you present yourself by default versus how you see yourself and where you want to be. I'll give you an example. For me personally, I don't wear t-shirts. Yes, I have athletic shirts that I wear when I go to the gym, but pretty much even all my

casual shirts have a collar. Straight up, my default shirt is a performance polo. I find that it works pretty much in any situation that I find myself in as a busy dad. I've dark-colored heavier jeans I wear during the winter, but during most of summer and spring and fall, I've got performance pants. Shoes, I just talked about this in another video. I really lean towards loafers especially during the summer, but when I'm wearing the jeans and the polos, you know, during the winter when I'm layering up, then I'll wear just slip-on boots like

Chelsea's. I don't normally wear a hat, but if I'm going be outside all day, I have a couple pantomoss I can rotate through. and a performance trilby, which is a nice looking hat especially when I'm traveling. Now, again, this is my default. It works for me in my work situation. I can walk in here, film a video. I can just simply throw a sports jacket over that performance polo, boom, get the job done. What's going to work for you? Only you can define that. You got to look at your job requirements, you got to look at your personal wants, your needs.

What kind of style do you want to bring in? What message do you want to send? But, to really make it a default, it needs to be a no-brainer. When you wake up, get dressed in the morning, the items that I just talked about for me are very easy to find. I've always got plenty of those performance polos, plenty of those performance pants. Anything I need to be able to bring that outfit together, I can do it. So, to level up your default style settings, you just need two things. You need to define exactly what image what presentation do you want to send

and then you need to purchase the basic items for at least one outfit. Again, you keep it simple, you get interchangeable. All of a sudden, you got three shirts, two pairs of trousers, that's six outfits, maybe four pairs of trousers, eight shirts, they're all very similar. All of a sudden, boom, what do you have right there? Thirty-two different outfits. That's what I love about the interchangeable wardrobe. Keep it simple, but make sure that you start with one outfit and then start upgrading everything else. On a side note here, if you're having

trouble letting go of clothing, you're like, don't know about this. Simply put the clothing in a box, put a date on it, and put it at the back of your closet. If you really say, hey, you know, this isn't for me after a month, if you need to get to that clothing, you simply open up the box. But, when you find you haven't opened that box for a year, you can safely donate the items. So, I read this crazy story about a doctor that went and he did all this research about why are patients not getting better. And it turns out that one-third of

his patients were not actually even going to the pharmacy to fulfill the prescription that he just gave them. And then, half of those that actually filled out the prescription were not even taking the medication. Literally, only one-third of the people he started with were actually getting the medicine and then taking it. Yet, these same people when it came to their animals, it was almost a hundred percent would go get the prescription and would then give it to their animal consistently. Why is it that we will take better care of dog than

we will take care of ourselves? And there's some deep psychological stuff here, but a lot of it has to with we just simply put others before us. Some people don't feel they're worthy, other people just simply they just always feel they got to be the martyr. This is something that society says to a lot of guys and we need to take care of ourselves, guys. So, think about someone you're responsible for. Would you let them skip their medication? Would you let them eat something that's harmful for them? Yet, we do this to ourselves all the time.

We think it's okay. We'll go to the gym at a later point. We'll take those vitamins that we need to be taking at a later point someday. Well, someday becomes never. Gents, turn someday into day one. Now, apps have made this lot easier and there are wearable devices out there. I know that have made it easier for me. Point being is you've got to start. Start somewhere because when you track something, guess what? You can measure it and anything you can measure, you can improve. And this is so key for life, whatever it may be, guys. We underestimate

what we're eating, we overestimate how much work we're putting into things. But, when you actually go out there and you log the measurements and you can simply use a notebook, I'm not saying you got to go all electronic here. you will be shocked at what you're putting into your body. You will be shocked at how little you're contributing to your, you know, financial stability. And here's the thing, you don't have to be perfect, you don't have to do everything at once. In fact, start off with one. You know with building a habit, they talk about 21 days,

that's a bunch of BS. What is going to build the habit is repetition and simply put because you could do something 21 times in a day and all of a sudden you're going to start to build a habit not necessarily within one day, but point being is you got to get in the repetition. You got to put in those reps and you've got to practice doing it. Again, this isn't easy, but it is simple and it is going to help you reach your full potential. Track everything. Now, over the years, I've talked about body types and I will link to my body type video

down in the description of today's video. But, I do want to say the big thing with understanding your body type is how to wear proportions that work with that body type. And, let me be clear, I'm all about body positivity if you are a thin guy, if you're a little bit of a bigger guy and you've been working for years, but just simply you can't lose that weight because it's the way you're built. I get it. You want to wear clothing though that is going to accentuate your strengths, not accentuate your weaknesses. And by weaknesses, let's look at the proportions.

So, if you're 5'4", in general, your head in proportion to your body is going to be a little bit larger than for a man that's 6'4". And what this can do is it makes you look cute, it makes you look uh childish. That's not what we're going for. We want to make sure you're wearing clothing that helps to offset the larger proportions that we see, you know, in this case with your head. If you're a really skinny guy, understanding your body type and the type of patterns and cuts that are going to work for you means that we want to add a little

bit of weight to you. We don't want you to wear clothing that is going to make you look even skinnier. The same thing with big guys. If you're a little bit bigger around the waist, we want you to look large and in charge, not fat and sloppy and not draw attention to that midsection area by going for a really bright colored belt. Instead, let's go for more of a monochromatic look that allows the eyes to go up and down spend a little bit more time looking at your shoes, looking at the accessories you got on the, you know, the ends of your arms and these

type of points. That's where we want to draw them up and actually draw people's attention up to your face, up to your eyes because that's where we want them to stay focused. Now, if you're looking to level up your style, you really need to check out my community over on school. I've set this community up, so we've got classes that you can make your way through step by step and learn the basic foundations of men's style. actually have giveaways. In fact, over the last year, I've given away over $25,000 in gear that has accumulated here in my office

and I love sending out to you guys for your charge. And I have to say the men that are in this group are freaking awesome. We've got a no a-hole policy, people treat each other with respect. And what we've managed to create in this community is a place where a man can come in and ask questions and get some solid advice. So, gents, use the link in the description of today's video. Go check out our communities on school. These are for you. Come the man you know yourself to be. So, now, let's take a step back to practicality, how to actually

improve your day-to-day style. We've been talking a lot about information, but I want you to go ahead and take everything out of your closet. Yes, make your bed, make sure it's clean, lay everything out. Let's see all of your shirts, all of your trousers, all your shorts, all your socks, everything. What you want to do is create three piles. You have your love, you have your like, and you have your loose pile. So, obviously, everything that goes in the loose pile, you're to go ahead and put into the donation box. Again, if you don't feel

like get rid of it, you're a little bit nervous about it, simply seal it up and put it at the back of your closet. Next up, you've got your love and your likes. Now, the love items should be pretty easy and there's probably not going to be a whole lot in there. These are items that fit you well. Every time you wear it, you get compliments. These are the items that you just simply love putting on. They make you feel like a million bucks. Now, the goal here is to eventually have a closet full of items that you love so that everything you're putting

on. Whether it's your socks, your underwear, your trousers, yeah, they don't get a lot of attention, but you know what? You love the fit, you love the feel, you just love putting these items on. But, for most people that's a ways out. Let's look at what you have in the like. So, is there any way for you to take anything in the like and actually get it upgraded? So, you've got these shirts that you like, but they're way too large. Okay. You're going to take it to a tailor. Because you can speak the language, you're going to explain exactly what you want.

I want a couple of darts in the back. They're relatively inexpensive. All of a sudden the shirt is going look better on you. You've got a little bit, you know, skinnier arms, you're going to get those sleeves adjusted on those short sleeve shirts because all of a sudden they're going to hug you a little bit better. They're just going to look better and you're going to go from liking to maybe even loving some of these items. Next up, let's look at how all these items work together and where are you dangerously low. Most likely, you do

have baby trousers. You got two pairs of jeans that you go to. And one of them dress up jeans, the other one are really your tear up casual jeans. You've only got one pair of good-looking jeans, so you rarely ever wear them because you want to keep them looking nice. How about you actually spend a little bit of money get two more pairs, maybe slightly different colors, maybe go with the same thing, but that you can start actually rotating that into your wardrobe and you don't feel bad because, you know, you're not wearing it every single Well, you actually

wear the same style every day, but it already works with everything in your wardrobe. Point being is you identify the weak areas where you can bring in more pieces It could be shirts, it could be you've got no casual jackets, you don't have a fatigue jacket, you don't have a denim jacket, you have no sports jackets. The point is once you've identified where this weakness is, all of a sudden you can direct resources to this key area. And I'm not saying you're going go out there and even spend money. You could talk to that uncle that's got the

same build as you and say, hey, man, you got anything left over? I had a great friend whose father he's called he used to raid all the time. The guy was, you know, a fashionista in the 1970s and he loved it. bringing back these looks. And it looked great. Seriously, Rob could rock these outfits and he had no problem with the ladies because the guy looked good, he always had a great smile, and he just felt good. And he had the same profile as his dad, so he was able to pull off all his clothing and it didn't cost him anything. Gents, going into thrift

stores, secondhand stores, St. Vincent de Paul, The Salvation Army, Goodwill, there is no shame in shopping in these places. In fact, I think there's a huge benefit because you're really free. from box stores and the fashions that are being pushed on you. In addition, a lot of that vintage clothing is of higher quality build, so you're actually getting the steel. And, believe it not, you can find some items that have been worn once. They're like 30 years, 40 years old, they're made well, and they weren't even taken out of the packaging. I know some

of you guys are going to have tons of holes in your closet like, Antonio, what do I buy first? So, with that in mind, gents, let me introduce you to three words I talk about in my style system, cornerstone clothing, keystone clothing, and capstone clothing. Now, for anyone familiar with architecture or construction, you know I stole those terms because a cornerstone by definition is the first stone that you set down in the construction of a masonry foundation. It is the foundation piece that all other things reference to. It literally determines the position

the foundation of the entire structure. So, cornerstone clothing is going to be your uniform. This is going to be the clothing you have to have either for your profession or for your own personal needs when you go out day to day. For many men still in today's modern world, a cornerstone piece of clothing is going to be the suit. For other people, it's going to be a casual pair of Chelsea's with dark-colored jeans. Now, for most people, they have to have these items in their wardrobe, but there's a good chance that you could upgrade this. Maybe

you bought that suit a decade ago or the material is just poor quality. Those jeans, you want to upgrade them to a higher quality type of denim. Those shoes, you want to change them out or maybe bring in an additional pair. Next up, we've got keystone clothing. Now, a keystone in architecture is the wedge-shaped stone piece at apex of a masonry arch. This piece locks all the other stones in place. So, this is going to be very similar to the cornerstone for the guy that has the suit. This is going to be his casual clothing like I talked about, maybe

jeans, it's going to be polo shirts, maybe a number of dark-colored button downs. For a lot of guys, this is going to be their day-to-day shoe, the one that they slip on. It could be a loafer, it could be a pair of brogues, it could just be a pair of running shoes that they've been defaulting to. The reality is your keystone pieces are going to be the majority of your core wardrobe. These are the essential pieces that you wear day in, day out, week over week. If you're missing anything here or you need to upgrade here, this would be the

next place I would look. Next up, let's talk about capstone pieces. Now, capstone, these are the final stones often flat ones used to cover the top of a building or a wall. Basically, these are the culminating pieces. You can do without them, but they really do complete the look. So, an example of a capstone piece is going to be a nice watch. It's a really nice thing to have and when you buy one, it could be an heirloom piece that you'll have for the rest of your life. But, can you live without it? The answer is yes. Now, this goes without

saying, but anything that you've purchased, make sure it works in an existing outfit that's going to be interchangeable. You don't want to have a shirt that goes with nothing that you're going to have to go out and buy another pair of trousers, a pair of shoes for. That is something that's not interchangeable and can be very expensive. I'm not saying you can't wear fashion pieces like that. What we're looking for here are items that are already going to work with your existing outfits. That way you can then take these new items and

you can create some signature looks. Now, these signature go-to looks our combination of individual items that you've crafted into an outfit. The point is with the signature go-to look, you've actually thought it through and you like the message that's being sent and you know how to piece those items together very quickly and that's what we want. Now, a lot of guys resist changing their wardrobe let alone upgrading their wardrobe because they're like, oh, come on, dress clothing, it's going to be uncomfortable. Going from a t-shirt to a performance polo,

oh, that's going to be, you know, I can't do that. thing is it's not uncomfortable. It's just unfamiliar. You're not used to it. Similar to going for a run. If you haven't been running for a while, the first time you're going to be a bit winded, you're to have to start walking in the middle of that run. But, after you've gone out for a few runs, after you've gone to the gym a few times, you start to know where everything is at. You don't have to ask where the bathroom is at. You don't need to, you know, help with your code. You know what the machines

are for or eventually you start to learn one machine at a time. You become more familiar and therefore you become more comfortable and you start to see the benefits. of this habit change. And that, gentlemen, is what makes elevating your daily style such a powerful thing because it's a daily application. Daily, you're now sending a message to the world, this is who I am, this is what I stand for without having to say a word. You dress the part of the man you know yourself to be. And, gents, that's when the magic starts to happen, when opportunities

start coming your way that previously would not. Fall in love with the process, not the results. When you look at a scale, whenever you look at yourself in the mirror, you are looking for results. You're looking for those six-pack abs, you're looking for those larger biceps, you're looking for that weight to drop down. But, no, be happy with actually that you went to the gym, that you went for that run, you went for that walk, you put in that effort. And that's what you want to reward, you want to feel good about. That is right

there going to change everything when all of sudden you fall in love with the process of going with the. gym. The process with actually figuring out how you can lose that weight, the process of becoming smarter, becoming more competent in your field. Simply putting and saying, you know what, I can't control whether or not I'm going to pass that exam. You know you're studying, you want to become a CFA. What you can do is you can say I'm going to put aside 30 minutes every morning and share it with others that you're going to do that 30

minutes. Your wife knows, your partner knows, everyone around knows that, that 30 minutes in the morning is yours and you're going to put that time in. And that's where you start to see the leaps. It's where you start to see the bounds. You start to see those incremental improvements that build up over time. James Clear talked about this in Atomic Habits, but results do not follow a linear path. Now, oftentimes, we don't see all the energy all that latent energy underneath the surface. Imagine watching an ice cube in a room, it's 20 degrees, 21,

22. As it goes up, we see nothing happening. Then, magically at 32 degrees, it starts to melt. Thirty-three degrees, it melts faster. Why is this happening? It's happening because of all the work all the temperature increase that happened over that time period. And the way that a bamboo for two years, the roots grow underneath and then within a period of a month, all of a sudden that stalk shoots right up. How does that happen? Because of all the work it saw that did and you didn't necessarily see. So, understand sometimes when you're going

after your goals when you are trying to achieve greatness, you're not going to see that progress. So, fall in love with the system. fallen off with the process and all of a sudden the results, yeah, they'll fall. So, what video to watch next? Well, gents, I've got a video for you right here. What is it? A mystery video. Come on, I'm have a little bit of fun here. I'm not going to wreck Roy. It will be safe for work. It will be an arm-rous video, probably an older one though that you haven't seen that is really good, a good message. So, yeah, go check it out, guys. You'll enjoy this video, I promise.

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