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Have you ever felt trapped on an endless cycle? Constantly doing more, achieving more, and yet never feeling truly fulfilled? Today, we'll reveal exactly why we get stuck on that endless hamster wheel of doing and offer a powerful shift to finally unlock genuine fulfillment. You're listening to Relish, the podcast for people ready to stop chasing self-improvement and start savoring their lives. If you're tired of the hamster wheel of healing and hungry for more joy, presence, and meaning, you're in the right place. Welcome back to Relish. I'm Elysia, and it is our third week together. I'm excited to kick things off with a fun, powerful, quick bite that introduces a life-changing framework. Today's brief
episode lays the groundwork. And then on Wednesday, we're going to dive in even deeper, exploring experientially and practically, and we're going to even talk a little bit about some fascinating neuroscience. I first learned about the framework I'm going to talk about today years ago at my Hoffman process. Uh, this is not original to them, but they do teach it brilliantly. And a quick note for my fellow visual learners. So, today's episode is going to introduce a wordbased framework. And if you are like me and you find auditory explanations a little bit tricky, I am going to be very intentional uh and clear with my words. But just so you know, we do have visuals available on the YouTube video and helpful
notes linked in the show description as well. Okay, so let's get into it. Most of us learn to approach life through this sequence. Do have be. It goes like this. If I do the school, I'll have the job that I need to be happy or successful. If I do the dating, I'll have the marriage, the partner, and then I'll be fulfilled. Does this sound familiar? Okay, I'm sure you have your own examples, but there tends to be this belief deeply ingrained that if I do enough, then eventually I'll have enough, and only then can I be okay. I know I certainly learned this sequence very early on and what I found is it kind of trapped me on what felt like a uh relentless hamster wheel of doing.
Always striving, always chasing the next achievement, hoping that whatever that reward was would finally make me feel okay. It would finally make me feel whole, complete. But does it ever arrive? There was always this sense of, you know, when I get there. And whatever did come, it was always fleeting. And so soon enough, I'd find myself chasing again. Why? Because what we're really after is the feeling. Happiness, peace, fulfillment. But this model of do, have, be, puts the feeling last. It makes our happiness dependent on something external. money, success, approval, relationships, you know, it makes it conditional on something we have to do and something outside of ourselves. It's
so disempowering because it means we can't feel good until we have achieved or received something external. And that ultimately means living through scarcity because I don't have whatever it is I need right now. It also reinforces this harmful subconscious message that we're not enough as we are right now. And I have found personally um it also keeps me with my mind and my intellect kind of running my life instead of being able to lead with my heart and my truth. Does this resonate? You know, have you been stuck in this cycle or is it just me? This was a mindblowing shift for me. I realized I was living as a human doing instead of a human being.
Wait, what? I mean, it's like a switch flipped. I'm a human being. So, how do we step off the hamster wheel? Instead of waiting for the be, we have to start with it. Okay, so visual learners stay with me here. Instead of living through do, have, be, we need to move the be from the end to the beginning. From do have, be, we shift to be, do, have. You are a human being. You start with the being, not the doing. Whoa. Okay. And then I was really on this mission to understand what does it actually mean to be? That kind of became my mission in life. It's actually what led me deeper into all my practices, meditation, personal growth, mindfulness. Uh, and I think maybe each of us has to kind of find our own answer to this, but here's
what I've discovered. Being is about presence. It's about showing up authentically as the person that I am right now, guided by my inner wisdom, my truth, my light. And it's about embodying curiosity and openness and compassion and kindness. Um, you know, these natural states, not from a place of striving, but from genuine alignment with my truest self. When I approach life from a place of being first, then the doing flows naturally from that authentic presence. And then I'm naturally going to have outcomes that reflect that alignment. you know, the things that I achieve can then actually feel genuine and fulfilling and meaningful rather than empty accomplishments that are kind of temporarily soothing. Is this landing?
Now, I have found that starting with being, it's really changed my relationship to my life. Now, on Wednesday in our full entree episode this week, we're going to dive deeper into practical ways to apply this framework. We're going to explore embodiment and what it actually feels like to live from being rather than doing. And I'll also share some neuroscience behind why this approach genuinely changes your experience to life. But for now, I invite you to just simply start noticing where have you gotten caught in the do, have be mindset. Doing, doing, doing. And what might shift if you experimented with be, do have instead? I just want you to sit with it, reflect on it. Feel free to jot it down or message me your thoughts.
Okay? So, that was your quick bite and I would love to hear your insights. Did this spark something in you? So, comment here or find me on socials, DM me, Alyssia Shake. I want to give another quick shout out to the Hoffman Process. I mentioned previously that I am a Hoffman Process teacher as well. And while this podcast isn't affiliated, I do hope you'll check it out. I've linked it in the notes. If this quick bite resonated, please follow, subscribe, rate us five stars. It genuinely helps grow the community so that more people can hopefully step off that hamster wheel together. And consider sharing this episode with someone else who might need this uh powerful shift in perspective. Don't forget to join me
again Wednesday for our deeper dive. And until then, remember, you are a human being, not a human doing. Relish your beautiful life exactly as you are right now. Thank you for being here. I appreciate you. I'll see you soon.
